The famous fairy tale hero Peter Pan is also the name of a behavioral problem in psychology.
We think there is no one who does not know the book Peter Pan by James Matthew Barrie (1860-1937). Published in 1904, the author’s acclaimed work Peter Pan is still among the unforgettable works of literature. Peter Pan, the protagonist of the book who wants to live forever as a child in Neverland, has become a well-known name not only in the world of literature but also in the fields of psychology and psychiatry.
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In this article, we talk about real Peter Pan’s and an interesting psychological syndrome that afflicts them. Although the character is fictional, the Peter Pan Syndrome is real and if you are dealing with it, you can learn the causes and how to overcome it.
What is Peter Pan Syndrome?
You are dealing with an adult who behaves like a child. He is harming himself and his relationships with his actions. Maybe you see this situation as spoiled or maybe you see it as indifference. However, you may be facing Peter Pan Syndrome.
Peter Pan Syndrome (Peter Pan complex) describes behavioral disorders in children who have a fear of growing up and in people who act like children even though they are mature. The syndrome is not currently recognized as a psychopathology. However, it is widespread, with more and more people in society exhibiting emotionally immature behavior even though they are adults. Although the condition affects both genders, research suggests that it is more common among men.
What Causes Peter Pan Syndrome?
A person who shows symptoms of this syndrome usually experiences career failure. They have difficulty being economically responsible. He/she expects a life where there is no responsibility, only fun. He/she often changes jobs and hobbies but is not satisfied with any of them.
He/she dreams dreams that are difficult to realize. He also does not take any logical and systematic steps to realize these dreams. They have a very high belief that they can do any job, but their effort is very low. They fear the future and aging. They are also unable to behave like adults in social and romantic relationships.
Researchers think that these people are often afraid of loneliness, so they try to surround themselves with people who will fulfill their needs. Even when this type of man becomes a father, he finds it difficult to take on the role of a parent and often leaves the burden on the mother’s shoulders.
Another characteristic of people suffering from Peter Pan Syndrome is that they are known to constantly change partners and seek younger ones. In the background of this are impulses of commitment and avoidance of responsibility. Peter Pan syndrome is not an officially recognized disorder. Therefore, the causes are not clear. However, it seems more likely that people who were spoiled in childhood without taking enough responsibility are more likely to develop this syndrome in adulthood.
Wendy Behind Peter Pan
Dan Kiley, the psychologist who defined the “Peter Pan Syndrome” in 1983, coined the term “Wendy Syndrome” to describe women who act like mothers in their relationships with their partners. According to Dr. Dan Kiley, Peter Pan men are very likely to be paired with Wendy women, one of the characters in the same story.
Wendy women take on the attitudes, responsibilities and behaviors that Peter Pan men avoid. These women tend to show a maternal attitude towards the Peter Pan man who refuses to take responsibility. Over time, they tend to think that they are indispensable to the person in their life. They take on too many responsibilities and these responsibilities can lead to burnout. After a while, it is inevitable that this woman takes on the role of protective “mother” in the relationship.
The biggest disadvantage of both disorders is that the person with this condition does not feel as if they are part of the problem and are not aware of it. As such, these syndromes significantly reduce the quality of life of the person or their partner and can put a great strain on social relationships.
